Indiana Police Explain Their Hate-itude

 MILAN, IN -  The Oak Hills party in Milan last weekend started out as a surprisingly great time for all involved, with lots of under-age drinking and any-age pot smoking, but the party organizers made one significant error: They didn't invite anyone from Indiana.

This mistake caused nine Indiana law enforcement agencies to sip "Haterade" at Ohio's expense,  and led to the arrest of 70 Cincinnati youth.  Nobody from Indiana was arrested.

According to official reports, the player-hating had started with one complaint over improperly parked cars.  The crime of improperly parked cars did not justify 70 arrests as much as the crime of not inviting the Milan Police Department to the party.  Milan Police Officer Jeb Podunkia was the first one to take umbrage at not being invited.

"We wanted to make a statement to Cincinnati," said Officer Podunkia, "You just don't throw a party in Milan without inviting the Milan Police Department."

Rather than just stopping the party, the Milan Police invited 8 other law enforcement agencies to take time out of their busy schedules to help crash the party.  The Indiana State Police, Sunman Police Department, Osgood Police Department, Batesville Police Department, Versailles Police Department, Moores Hill Police Department, Ripley County Sheriff's Office, and Dearborn County Sheriff's Office all joined in on the hating.