The Cincinnati Dealer - Obituaries from 2015

Obituary in the year 2015

CINCINNATI - Former Mayoral candidate Mark Mallory passed away this week after a coronary said to have been brought on by vigorous sex with a male intern. Mallory lost decisively to David Pepper in the 2005 mayoral election.

The former news anchor, state senator and pederast had pretty much disappeared from Cincinnati after numerous allegations surfaced before the 2005 mayoral election that he was a member of NAMBLA.

NAMBLA couldn't not be reached for comment.

Quick Poll

After Ike's damage to Cincinnati, how are you taking precautions against future hurricanes?

	Purchasing a windbreaker
	Cutting down every tree within 150 feet of my house
	Practicing dialing Duke Energy's phone number in the dark
	Looking for Duke Energy technicians who are willing to accept bribes
	Reading "Fixing Broken Power Lines For Dummies"
	Making sure my Bengals season tickets next year will be far away from the "wind tunnel" section
	Moving to the Gulf Coast, where people are actually warned in advance about hurricanes

What Grinds Your Gears?
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