The Cincinnati Dealer - Bengal-dom Waits for Sky to Fall

Bengal-dom Waits for Sky to Fall

By Edmund Osterman | Dealer staff writer

Wed, Sep 28, 2005

CINCINNATI - After three solid wins to open the season, the Bengals are one of four unbeaten teams in the NFL. The national media has taken notice; ESPN placed the Bengals fourth in this week's NFL power rankings. With each win, the odds increase for a season-crippling event.

In response to the best team's start since 1990, worried Bengals fans have curled into the fetal position on couches everywhere. Current bets available at local sports books include:

Cincinnati-style DUI of highly public Bengals coach: 5-1
Chad "7/11" Johnson tears ACL during touchdown jig: 8-1
Rich Braham tears ACL during touchdown jig: 150-1
In fourth quarter of sixteenth consecutive Bengals win, Paul Brown Stadium is swallowed into the earth and flooded by the Ohio River as unicorns storm the field and trample the entire team, including the practice squad: 14-1

Quick Poll

A weighted voting system, Proportional Representation (PR), may be on the ballot. How do YOU feel?

	This poll is invalid since I can't rank my choices.
	Leslie Ghiz is my #1, but I can't decide who to rank #2, Pat Fischer or John Eby.
	I can understand why the NAACP supports PR, since Charlie Winburn would likely replace Laketa Cole on council in 2009.
	I prefer the current model of electing the same 9 people every two years.
	I'm torn about PR. I would love to rank Sam Malone in dead last on a PR ballot, but I don't know if I could stomach voting for him.
	Does this mean Justin Jeffre and Michael Earl Patton will stop running for Council after they discover they still can't win under PR? Then I'm all for it.
	This system will only encourage more crazy people to run for City Council... and so I support it.
	Call me old-fashioned, but I would prefer it if the candidates with the most votes win.

What Grinds Your Gears?
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