The Cincinnati Dealer

Classifieds

LOST - Girlfriend, Cheryl, last seen screaming at Wal-Mart cashier. Approx. 5'1", portly, loud, possessive, needy, unsupportive, and domineering. If found, keep the bitch.

MOVED - Bowels.

Quick Poll

After Ike's damage to Cincinnati, how are you taking precautions against future hurricanes?

	Purchasing a windbreaker
	Cutting down every tree within 150 feet of my house
	Practicing dialing Duke Energy's phone number in the dark
	Looking for Duke Energy technicians who are willing to accept bribes
	Reading "Fixing Broken Power Lines For Dummies"
	Making sure my Bengals season tickets next year will be far away from the "wind tunnel" section
	Moving to the Gulf Coast, where people are actually warned in advance about hurricanes

What Grinds Your Gears?
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