NORWOOD - The few houses still standing at the site of the impending Rookwood Exchange strip mall represent a threat to future parking spaces, driveways, boutiques, and steakhouses, the First District Court of Appeals ruled on Friday.

According to Judge Mark Painter, "The area around these homes and businesses has been completely bulldozed. There's lots of mud, plus some really dirty construction vehicles. Gross!  Also, people are actually driving their cars nearby. It just doesn't get any more blighted than that, folks."

"If these people were to actually hold onto their properties, as they desire, the traffic at my new Rookwood Exchange will further blight their properties." said Andersen, "The area is clearly not suitable for any other property owners. Well, except for the people who'll buy my new condos. You're okay."

Due to the convenient shopping attractions at the clusterfuck that is Rookwood, many Hyde Park residents regularly commit what used to be a social faux pas: entering Norwood.