I had the great pleasure of spending several days in the kitchen of Chef Billy Kripe’s charming eponymous restaurant in Norwood. Chef Kripe was a generous and hospitable host, and he patiently answered my many questions about his kitchen and cuisine. He shared two recipes with me, which I’ve adapted for those of us who don’t have professional kitchens at their disposal.

Try this elegant dish and you’ll find out just how wonderful cooking and eating can be.

You will need:

10 tablespoons of unsalted butter

1 cup of vegetable oil

1 bottle of Jack Daniels

3 cups of light chicken stock

2 cups of wild rice

2 tablespoons of fresh basil leaves, snipped to fine shreads

10 whole monkey fingers

1 Bengal’s brain (preferably a player that rides the bench)

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

1. Drink the bottle of Jack Daniels.

2. Chop the monkeys fingers off (It might be easier to kill the monkey first, but Chef Kribe suggests that you do it while the monkey is still alive).

3. Kidnap the Bengal (In this case we have kidnaped a former 3^rd string quarterback that is no longer in the NFL). Kill the Bengal. Remove the brain.

4. Separate the prefrontal cortex, the primary motor cortex and the visual cortex from the rest of the brain and tie them together with butcher’s string.

5. Insert the monkey fingers around the brain so that they protrude upward to simulate the monkey holding the brain.

6. Place in cooking pan with chicken stock, basil leaves and vegetable oil

7. Baste with butter and place in oven, cook for 45 minutes.

8. Garnish with wild rice

Recommended side dishes: Turtle, Rhino esophagus, wet sand, Alica Reece’s makeup, or Nick Spencer’s girlfriend.